"Our community is better because you're in it. "
"Try to be a rainbow in someone's cloud. "
"How do trees access the internet? They log in. "
"You are awesome! "
"Character is what you are in the dark. "
"The integrity of men is to be measured by their conduct, not by their professions. "
"Anything other than a yes is no / Anything other than staying is go / Anything less than I love you, is lying "
"If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments. – Flip Wilson "
"You are already of consequence in the world if you are known as a man of strict integrity. "
"Man who goes to bed with an itchy butt . . . wakes up with a stinky finger! "
"Political correctness the rigging of politics using different rules for different groups, and buttressed by the media ensures that Democrats always have the upper hand. "
"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing. "
"In the depth of winter, I finally learned that there lay within me an invincible summer. "
"To the guy who created imaginary numbers in math: I hate you. "
"Integrity was very important. "
"If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the up button. – Sam Levenson "
"You can't really be strong until you can see a funny side to things. "
"My wife made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday. "
"If you think women are the weaker sex, try pulling the blanket back to your side. – Stuart Turner "
"A single lie destroys a whole reputation of integrity. "
"No matter how good you are, someone is always going to be against you. But never let them be the limit of your success. "
"Courage isn’t having the strength to go on – it is going on when you don’t have strength. "
"Being around you is like being on a happy little vacation. "
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon. "
"If there is one thing we know, is that this sucks. "
"Politics is a blood sport. "
"I'm lying to make you feel better. See? Sometimes lying is awesome. "
"Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Breasts don’t have eyes. "